I want to

I want to
blurt it all out
like paintballs thrown against a white canvas
exploding everywhere
without expecting a defined outcome.

I want to
allow my heart
to venture into those tender territories
guarded by experience
and warning signs.

I want to
embrace what I feel…
not just walk down the road
but full out sprint towards the depths of my heart
pushing from my mind the unavoidable fork
just a little further along.

So what about this moment?
What do I do
in this dire need to express
release
scream out
and cry out for you.

Do I deny what’s still there?
Add another lock to the already cemented door
that the breeze so easily blows open?
Ignore the glance that grasps my heart
and demands immediate reaction?

How weak am I…
that a yes or a no
has streaks of water
running down the window of reality.
My moment’s mood
still shows if you
have been here or maybe more significantly,
that you are not.